Good, good Kasenhis! My boy!
Dumbledore was very happy but looking at Kasenhis who was still behaving somewhat immature, he decided to give him some pointers. He should act like a dignified man in front of the lady!
[Kasenhis! This isn't Hogwarts—please try to act like a dignified man.. or just a normal person!] Dumbledore ground his teeth and condensed his voice into a whisper thread that slipped right into Kasenhis's ear.
[OK OK…] Kasen replied.
On the other side, Rostammer chose the perfect moment to suggest that the two of them go out for drinks sometime.
"Uh, that's really not necessary, is it?" Kasenhis responded instinctively.
Rostammer kept her smile, but it had turned a bit stiff. "Didn't you just say you wanted a drink? Now you suddenly don't?"
"I do want to drink—just… not go out. Or maybe you could just mail the alcohol to Hogwarts?"
Eh?
The moment Kasenhis said that, Dumbledore—sitting beside him—instantly stopped smiling.
He turned to Kasenhis with the expression of someone staring at an alien.
"Huh? You don't want… just the two of us going out?" Rostammer asked through gritted teeth.
Kasenhis shook his head.
"Then why did you agree earlier when I said we could hang out when I'm in England?"
"You didn't say it had to be just the two of us. We could totally bring some friends along," Kasenhis replied, absolutely matter-of-fact.
Rostammer's bewildered eyes subtly glanced toward Karkaroff—and almost instantly, Karkaroff shot a look back.
[Seal the deal and I'll give you a raise!] This time Karkaroff spoke to Rostammer.
Rostammer took a deep breath. "I'm begging you—just the two of us, go out for a drink!"
Kasenhis shook his head. "My mom doesn't let me go to bars alone."
"Aren't we two people? And… aren't you an orphan?"
"She also doesn't let me go out with strangers. And I'm not an orphan—my family is loving, harmonious, and perfectly intact. They're just… not in this world."
Rostammer's face still wore a perfectly polite smile, but inside, she was already this close to grinding her silver molars into dust.
At this point, the only thing she wanted to do was write to her aunt Rosemerta immediately and tell her: next time this cursed professor tries to drink anywhere near her, spike his drink to hell and back.
Still, she quickly adjusted her attitude—perhaps due to being dazzled by the promise of that juicy raise Karkaroff had hinted at. Her eyes sparkled with the light of capitalism, and she humbled herself with a low, forced tone:
"Let me rephrase. We're both adults. Maybe we can do what adults do. Or to put it plainly—I'm asking you to go have a drink with me. I'm begging you!"
"Oh!" Kasenhis finally understood. After all, as a super emotionally intelligent professor, how could he not pick up on that kind of hint?
Then, with genuine kindness and understanding, he said:
"You're trying to court me, aren't you?"
Rostammer was on the verge of tears.
Right now, all she wanted was to yank out her wand and give Karkaroff a good hard whack on the head, then rob his vault blind and flee to some faraway land with all the gold he embezzled from the school board.
But alas—harsh reality pulled her dreams back to earth like gravity.
"Yes! So do you accept my invitation?" she said through clenched teeth.
Kasenhis raised his head and stared at the ceiling at a noble 45-degree angle. After a full ten seconds of dramatic silence...
"No."
"Huh?" Rostammer's expression cracked for the first time.
"You see," Kasenhis began, "I'm a man. You're a woman. Our genders don't match. Bit unfortunate, really—sorry about that. Of course, I'm not saying there's anything wrong with you. In fact, you're probably the most beautiful witch I've ever met. But like I said, our genders are incompatible."
He delivered this with peak emotional intelligence, genuinely believing he'd offered the perfect, face-saving explanation for both of them.
Rostammer, however, was hit with the sudden urge to cry. But she gritted her teeth and forced it back down.
That said, she absolutely couldn't stay in this cursed conference room for another second. Without a word, she turned and walked straight out, and if one looked closely, it did seem like she subtly wiped her eyes on the way out.
"…Was that too much?" Kasenhis whispered quietly to Dumbledore. "I thought I handled that with maximum grace for both of us."
"....."
"You... never mind, forget it..." Dumbledore sighed, utterly defeated.
Meanwhile, Karkaroff, who had only just chased after Rostammer for a few seconds, was suddenly blasted back into the room by a purple spell.
"Looks like Miss Rostammer isn't in the best mood right now," Kasenhis remarked, with absolutely zero self-awareness.
And just like that—he successfully plunged the entire conference room into dead silence.
Eventually, it was Madame Maxime and Professor Pond who broke it.
Madame Maxime's clever mind recalled something Kasenhis had said earlier:
Our genders don't match.
So what if… their genders did match?
She immediately gave Professor Pond a look.
Poor Professor Pond—already an old man—was now being silently pressured by his headmistress into playing the dirtiest of political cards.
His wrinkled old face turned bright red as he slowly scooted over and sat beside Kasenhis… then reached out and placed a hand on Kasenhis's thigh—where he was only wearing a single layer of pajama shorts.
"..."
[Cast sequence: Launch + Damage + Fireworks + Gravity]
Kasenhis quickly used his upgraded Arcane Art magic to compile a brand-new combo spell. In the next moment, a red flash of light erupted beside him and shot straight toward Professor Pond.
Whoosh!
Poor Professor Pond was launched like a rocket, smashing through the window and soaring into the sky to a perfect height. Then—Gravity Magic activated.
Almost instantly, an indescribable force slammed down on him, and he plummeted toward the earth at breakneck speed.
BOOM!!!
Meanwhile, Rostammer was in the corridor, checking herself in the mirror and brooding over whether her charm had truly faded. That was when a human figure came crashing down from the sky, kicking up a massive cloud of dust.
"The hell?" she blinked in surprise, casually flicking her wand. A breeze scattered the dust, revealing Professor Pond embedded in the ground like a lawn ornament.
She blinked again and Apparated over. "What happened to you?"
As the alchemical protection amulet on Pond's chest finally cracked to pieces, he exhaled in relief. "Can you do me a favor?"
"Hmm?"
"Hit Madam Maxime with something brutal. Like what you did to Karkaroff!"
Rostammer nodded in understanding. "Karkaroff is my boss—me hitting him is an internal Durmstrang matter. But hitting Maxime… what do you take me for, some kind of thug?"
"Oh… then could you at least give me a hand?" Pond, realizing his desperate gamble had failed, sighed and reached out.
"Heh."
Rostammer had absolutely no sympathy for someone who treated her like a pawn in some dumb plan. She just rolled her eyes and Apparated away, leaving poor Professor Pond still embedded in the ground like a sad garden gnome.
"Dumbledore… I don't think this place is safe anymore…" Kasenhis whispered. "Like, seriously—there was a gay ambush in the conference room and no one even noticed!"
Dumbledore, as expected, nodded thoughtfully. "And how do you see me, then?"
_________
(～￣▽￣)～Read 12 Chapters ahead:
Patreon: Dragonel