"In my next life, I'll be a proper snake—biting anyone I see, never giving anyone the chance to treat me like a pet."
After Cohen said "the first time," the old basilisk's heart sank.
"Great, it's Cohen! You're saved!"
Sisoko tried to "lighten the mood," but it didn't seem to work very well…
"My heart's not beating anymore—is that just in my head?" The old basilisk slumped onto the table, feeling the changes in its body. "Or… *gah*…"
Cohen only now realized that some creatures really do make a "*gah*" sound when they die. This world was basically a giant anime.
"Why'd he stop moving all of a sudden?!" Sisoko panicked, slithering closer.
"Grandpa's dead!" the little basilisk chirped happily.
"You don't have to sound so cheerful about it," Sisoko scolded. "This is a sad thing—wait, don't eat him!"
Sisoko quickly pulled its head back a bit.
Because the little basilisk on top had already opened its mouth again, trying to swallow something way bigger than itself. Last time it did that, the target was Sisoko.
"Did those Silver Key people mess up the prep work before hatching? Or is there something wrong with the rooster egg?" Cohen eyed the little basilisk suspiciously. "It doesn't look too bright… or maybe all baby basilisks are this dumb?"
"It's only a month old," Sisoko said protectively. "Being able to speak meaningful Parseltongue already makes it pretty smart. Other species are still nursing at that age."
"When I was a month old, I could already rack up 300 kills in a row," Cohen bragged. "Back then, I was just a tiny little badass…"
The old basilisk twitched, mumbling something under its breath, but Cohen and Sisoko were too busy debating the little basilisk's intelligence and future training plans to pay much attention.
"If it's too dumb, we'll just feed it to Norbert," Cohen teased, smirking at the little basilisk. "Yep, that's the right look on your face—that dragon living in the cave."
"Don't scare the kid!" Sisoko thumped the floor with its tail. "It's still little!"
In reality, its coiled-up body was already bigger than Cohen.
"Doesn't anyone care if I'm dead or alive?" the old basilisk asked, sounding heartbroken.
"You're alive, aren't you?" Cohen said reassuringly.
"Cohen doesn't even look worried," Sisoko noted. "I knew he had it under control—you're not actually in danger."
"Honestly…" Cohen scratched his head. "I didn't. I just assumed he was already dead, so I started talking about the little one's education. Figured it might cheer you up a bit. I'm not big on sappy scenes."
"Grandpa doesn't taste good…" the little basilisk said, disappointed, as it saw the old basilisk move again.
"…"
"…"
"…"
The room fell into a long, awkward silence, and for a moment, no one could pinpoint exactly why.
"So, is the old guy like me now?" Sisoko asked. "He's not under that Voldy-whatsit's control anymore?"
"Voldemort," Cohen corrected. "I won't roast you for your pronunciation since snakes have bad hearing."
"I've got… a weird feeling…" The old basilisk wriggled its body awkwardly. "It's like… I can't feel Salazar anymore…"
"You mean the curse Salazar Slytherin put on you?" Cohen guessed.
Slytherin was most likely dead by now, and a dead wizard couldn't maintain a curse on a living creature—curses need a constant supply of magic. That's the key difference between alchemical objects and items under a spell's influence.
Salazar Slytherin must've set up a magical source for the curse—and now, whatever was powering it in the basilisk had been destroyed and rebuilt.
No clue how it worked, but success was success.
"Why don't you try slithering into the lake?" Sisoko suggested. "You couldn't go there before, right?"
After sending the old basilisk off to explore the lake bottom, Cohen stopped Sisoko and the little basilisk.
"You two can't leave. Slytherin didn't put curses on you," Cohen said.
"Have you finally come around?" Sisoko said, touched. "Are you finally letting us into your—"
"Not yet," Cohen cut off Sisoko's daydream. "We've still got a script to follow. Later, I'm gonna test some glare-blocking contact lenses on you. Moving into the suitcase will have to wait until tomorrow. I've got a raid planned with Voldemort—if everything goes smoothly, I'll fit you with the lenses, and then I can officially bring you into the suitcase."
As long as they didn't attack indiscriminately, basilisks weren't *that* dangerous. Honestly, they might even be less of a threat than Norbert—after all, Norbert's sneezes set stuff on fire.
As for the materials issue under this tight timeline…
When Cohen sent the Earl to buy rats, he'd also had him check a few potion shops. Re'em blood was too rare—barely anywhere sold it.
So Cohen decided to try dragon fat instead.
With Norbert's size, scraping a little off its fat layer wouldn't hurt—like a mosquito bite for a human.
"You don't have to act like I'm about to violate you or something…"
Cohen grabbed the oil and left the cave, climbing back out of the suitcase.
Carving patterns into a transparent rubber sheet took time and focus, but Cohen had a natural knack for it. He didn't need to double-check every line—alchemical creations didn't mess up alchemy.
"Why's your attitude toward this little basilisk so hot and cold?" Cohen asked casually, glancing at Sisoko, who was coaxing the little one to sleep. "It's not even related to you, and a month ago, you said you didn't want a daughter."
"Jealous, huh?" Sisoko teased, slithering over to Cohen after making sure the little basilisk was asleep under the table. "I knew you still had a soft spot for me—"
"No feelings here. Keep pushing, and I'll ditch it," Cohen interrupted. "I'm just curious why your attitude flipped."
"Snakes get lonely too," Sisoko said in a lecturing tone. "So do you—or at least, you will someday. We live a long time, and eventually, we figure out life's more than just eating and sleeping. There's this empty feeling—loneliness. But in the end, we decide to connect with other lives to make things more interesting…"
"You feel that way about the old basilisk too?" Cohen asked, finishing the patterns and carefully pouring liquid materials onto the "contact lenses." "If it really died, you'd cry, right? Wait, no—snakes don't cry."
"If you want to bond with someone, you've got to risk shedding a tear," Sisoko said, sounding way too profound for a snake.
"That's from *The Little Prince*," Cohen pointed out. "Next time you quote a fairy tale, give it a heads-up. I almost thought you were Dumbledore in disguise—done!"
Cohen finished the "anti-glare alchemical sunglasses." They were supposed to be contact lenses, but to him, they looked more like a transparent rag.
Compared to the old basilisk getting injected with some mystery potion mix, sticking a rag in an eye wasn't even that risky.
Still, fitting it into a basilisk's eyelid was tricky. For one, Sisoko's eyes were way bigger than a normal snake's. For another, it kept blinking at the wrong time—like someone who shuts their eyes when you try to put in eye drops.
"Keep your eyes open!" Cohen snapped after the eighth failed attempt, when Sisoko's eyelid pushed the lens out again.
"I'm trying!" Sisoko whined, irritated by the scratchy little things. "You try keeping your eyes open after something's poking them…"
"I can control my glare. Blame it on basilisk instincts."
Cohen was getting annoyed by the repeated failures too.
"Guess we'll have to go with Plan B."
"?"
Sisoko watched as Cohen pulled a double-headed hammer out of the toolbox.
"Let's poke it blind first, then stick it on," Cohen said, flashing the sharp end of the hammer.
"Calm down, kid!" Sisoko hissed at the hammer in Cohen's hand. "If I go blind, I won't need glasses!"
…
Fair point.
If it went blind, all this work would be for nothing.
After some thought, Cohen cooled off.
"Come here. Let's try something else," he sighed, shoving the hammer back into the toolbox. "I'll see if I can hold your eyelid steady."
A basilisk's eyelids had the same magic-blocking scales as its body, so spells wouldn't work to hold them.
Cohen had to use both hands to pry Sisoko's eyelid open, letting the "lens" fall onto its eye naturally via gravity.
It took forever—mostly because Cohen didn't want any other part of his body near Sisoko's slimy eye.
"This feels gross—" Sisoko squirmed, clearly uncomfortable. "Is it done yet?"
"Almost, just a little more."
Cohen shook Sisoko's head a bit.
Finally—
"I'm back!" the old basilisk burst through the wall, thrilled. "I can go outside! I saw so much stuff, but—what are you guys doing?"
To the old basilisk, it looked like Cohen was hugging Sisoko's head, their faces super close…
*Snap!*
Cohen let go of Sisoko's eyelid, and the lens settled perfectly.
"Just putting on glasses," Cohen explained.
"Oh, I thought I was interrupting something…" the old basilisk said awkwardly.
"Hiss…"
Sisoko swayed side to side, trying to get used to the weird feeling in its eyes.
"Alright, time for the other one," Cohen said, holding up the second lens.
This time, it wasn't as bad for Sisoko, thanks to the old basilisk's help. It used its tail to hold Sisoko's eye steady and fit the lens.
They could've woken the little basilisk to help earlier, but that probably would've ended with it accidentally gouging Sisoko's eye out—the kid never knew its own strength.
"Let's test it first."
Cohen had the old basilisk turn around, leaving just Sisoko facing him.
Then, Cohen pulled out a fresh rat the Earl had bought from his pocket.
"Squeak, squeak, squeak—"
(End of Chapter)