My eyes meet yellow gold ones, like a wildfire in its essence, the color of scorched gold. Breathtaking, like sunlight trapped in amber, beautiful in a way that's not mine.
A face with skin smooth enough to glide over, deep brown wavy locks cascading over her shoulders, a sharp jawline and high cheekbones but not overly defined, striking in a way that's not mine.
Cheeks soft and plush that makes you want to give it a satisfying pinch and pull, delicate in a way that's not mine.
Lips, pink and full in a way that's not mine, never mine.
The girl staring back at me, was disarmingly enchanting, in a way that I never was.
I slowly extend my hand forward, and the girl does the same. My hand soon touches warm glass, the window pane of the car. The afternoon sun shimmers upon us. She looks so real, I almost feel like I'm hallucinating the reflection.
A reflection.
My head snaps from side to side hoping to find her, the real her to whom this reflection belongs to. But I find no one, except the man whose tire I just fixed, looking almost cautious.
My pulse spikes up as the realisation drowns upon me, like a thousand arrows piercing my heart at once, blood pounding in my ear, body shaking with anticipation.
I stare back at the reflection which mirrors my movements, my confusion, my dread and fear. Everything about her is different, wrong, and yet most importantly... mine?
Mine. She is me. I am her. We are one.
My knees almost buckle. I grip the edge of the car to steady myself, grip the phone in my hand harder to ground myself, but the world still spins.
No..no..no, this is fucking impossible. To die is one thing, to live again is another, to become someone else is fucking otherworldly.
A maelstrom of emotions wage a war inside me, mirroring the storm brewing overhead. All my questions, fears, dread, rage, frustration, confusion blurring into something dark and ugly.
I forget how to feel, don't know what to feel. I always tell myself I'll figure it out. But how can I say that again when I'm not even me anymore.
My life is gone. Elara is gone. I am gone.
The gale whips at my head, dark black clouds surround me, not a single sign of the shimmering afternoon sun that used to be.
The sky darkens quickly, and before I know it, tiny raindrops whisper at my cheek. Their soft chatter quickly picks up pace. I look up, eyes closed and let them drench me in my devastation, and I mourn the girl I once was.
"We should proabably get inside", he warns, voice laced with the slightest bit of worry, "You don't look fine"
I straighten up almost instantly. I shove his phone toward his chest, he barely catches it flinching. I don't look back and just run.
I run, run, run, without turning back. I don't even look back when I hear him yelling for me to stop.
I don't want to stop, I can't stop.
I run in any direction and every direction I can. I run to forego the past, I run to escape the dread of facing the future. I don't want to know what lies ahead, if anything is left for me, at all.
The buildings rush backward, the white lines on the roads blur, the angry honking cars on the street deafen me, the people scrambling for shelter under black umbrellas swirl my vision. Everything is black and white, everything is unclear and fuzzy.
The emotions simmer in my veins, begging for release .
My anger boils over, I shiver with rage as I charge, I hate my fate for being so unfair, hate my luck for being so fickle, and hate myself for being so useless and powerless to stop it.
Suddenly a huge truck with bright blinking lights charges toward me.
This is it, I'm going to die again
Its thunderous honk matches the sound of the lightning above bolting toward me like a beast untamed.
Yet, I don't stop, not because I'm overcome by grief, but because I want for once, more than anything to be fearless.
I want to be the girl who faces things head on, without flinching.
At this point, there is no terror in me, no second thoughts, only angst and desperation transforming into something unfathomable.
Joke's on you fate, I'm not Elara anymore, I'm not powerless anymore, I will win if only for this moment.
You can't stop me. No one can.
In a matter of seconds, the truck and I are face to face, only a few moments short from becoming one.
The adrenaline soars in my blood, my fists clench tight enough to render me numb, the rain keeps falling, and the earth keeps spinning.
And then...
A shining flash of light from my pocket and,
I'm falling
Literally falling.
My foot slips on the slippery street flooded with rainwater, and I slip sideways landing on the side path right on my back with huge impact.
I instinctively roll over bracing for more pain that shoots up my spine. The truck whooshes past me, the vehicle of a beast which just moments ago threatened to kill me now vanished out of view as if it never existed.
I croak out a laugh, further choking on my own tears at the same time.
Oh that felt good. That felt...free
I wince slightly at the pain that braces my right arm and manage to stand slowly.
I put forth slow and steady steps breathing heavily as the storm above tones down to a mere drizzle, I spot a bench from the corner of my eye near a cafe at the intersection.
I can't really tell where I am, but this part of town feels pretty secluded, I hardly spot a few people brimming about.
I carefully plop myself on to the bench and soon, an unbidden smile covers my face, or rather my new face.
I almost died again and weirdly enough,
I've never felt this alive before
As my breathing steadies, I wring out my hair that is soaked from rainwater, and try to squeeze out the excess water from my shirt, which has turned pretty translucent after getting drenched.
I sit there idly for a few long moments, and before I know it, the sky transitions to a pretty shade of orange pink.
The breeze whirls around me like a whisper, and then I'm freezing cold. A shiver runs through me as I wrap my arms around myself and start rubbing my palms against each other in a futile attempt to warm myself.
I can't sit here for long
Maybe it's because I'm still sitting at the peak of my newfound freedom and strength, fear hasn't touched me yet.
But I know it will soon claw its way back to me, if I don't find any shelter soon. Standing up and walking through the streets I don't regonize , I realise that I'm lost, not that I wasn't before...but at least, that guy Aiden thought I wasn't.
As I progress walking nowhere, the dim lights of the streetlights provide no sense of security. Right then, along the secluded street I spot a brightly lit building.
A hotel
My eyes lit up and just as I cautiously allow myself to hold to that flicker of hope, a voice rings out in my head that makes me pause in my tracks.
You don't even have money, or a phone, or an identity for that matter. You don't exist here
I curse under my breath in frustration, but as I start kicking practically nothing but air in pure agony, I feel a weight in my pocket almost restrict my actions.
Oh
Oh shit.
The ring.
Right, that thing I found earlier before I was distracted by the smug little bastard.It looked pretty....shiny. Might even be expensive. This is it. My jackpot. Sure, I could trade it in exchange for 4 days of shelter and food right?. As if on cue, my traitorous stomach grumbles in agreement.
I quickly thrust my hand into my skirt pocket to retrieve the ring, but instead when my palm is met with something metal, blunt and plastic. My brows furrow slightly as I pull it out.
What could that be?.....