Chapter 249: Haibara Ai's Problem
Outside the Beika Sun Plaza Hotel, the Light Rain had stopped, and the Sky was a dull gray.
Kazato Kyosuke was led out of the Hotel's Main Gate by two Police Officers, walking towards the Police Car.
The Mori family arrived in Wataru Takagi's Car and stood Aside, Looking.
Mori Kogoro Turned Head and asked Mouri Ran, "Ran, did you Realize anything?"
Chi Feichei accompanied them Beside, Observing Mouri Ran's Reaction.
Mouri Ran looked at Kazato Kyosuke blankly for a moment, shook her Head, feeling a bit guilty, "Sorry."
"It's okay, take your Time," Kisaki Eri comforted. "Now the Murderer has been Seized. When Officer Sato wakes up, I'll take you to visit her."
Haibara Ai whispered Aside, "Actually, not being able to remember is not necessarily a Bad Deed. If it were me, I would rather forget completely, forget my Older Sister's Death, forget those People and those Matters, and Just be a carefree Little Girl..."
Conan was Be Stunned, Turned Head to Look at Haibara Ai, "Haibara, you..."
Chi Feichei gave Haibara Ai a Glance, Didn't Say Anything, Step Forward, Received the Evidence Bag from July's Hand, and took out the transparent umbrella.
"Hey! Brother Chi..."
July hadn't Realized yet, Chi Feichei had Already opened the umbrella, blocking in front of Kazato Kyosuke, Turned Head and asked Mouri Ran.
"Ran, how about this?"
Mouri Ran was stunned in the Original Place, and gradually some surprised Spirit appeared in her Eyes, "I See it, and Also... Officer Sato's Injury..."
Chi Feichei Once Seeing, was relieved. Thankfully it didn't collapse, Otherwise it would have to be changed to "The 7-year-old Famous Detective and His Amnesiac Girlfriend" in the Future. "Officer Sato is Already out of Danger and is almost awake."
"Is that so..." Mouri Ran breathed a sigh of relief, "That's great!"
"Ran..." Mori Kogoro cautiously Looked at Mouri Ran.
"Father!" Mouri Ran Turned Head Smilingly.
Kisaki Eri wiped away Tears, "It's good that you Realized..."
Here, the family poured out their hearts to each other.
There, Chi Feichei squatted down, his Gaze directly on Haibara Ai who had followed, "Ai's Older Sister Died?"
Haibara Ai pursed her lips, hesitated for a moment, Nodded, but was clearly unwilling to Say more.
"Then you absolutely cannot Throw away your Memory. I Previously heard a Sentence," Chi Feichei whispered, "If Even If you forget her, she would be equivalent to never having existed."
Haibara Ai Felt her Nose feel a bit sore, and quickly lowered her Head, not daring to let Others See.
That's right, a Human who no longer exists in this World, only exists in her Memory. If Even If she forgets, how cruel would that be to that person?
"Ai, the World is not Just one Color, a Human's Life is Also the Same. Not only does it have Red representing Joy, but Also has blue representing sadness. Memory is the Painting Scroll that Records a Lifetime. Having Just one Color is too monotonous. Whether good or bad, blue or Red, every Color on it is your Own unique Color, finally forming a unique Painting Scroll," Chi Feichei patted Haibara Ai's Head. "Escaping is useless. Wait Until one Day, you go See that Painting Scroll Again, no longer Just See a certain X-ray Scan of azure and Pitch Black, but See its overall splendor, you Again recall your Own Memory, no longer Just Feel sadness and pain, but Also Feel nostalgia from within, then you will truly have grown up."
From the perspective of the early Plot, Haibara Ai would Suddenly become pessimistic, nervous and uneasy, Think there is no Future and is not needed by the World, attempting to give up Life, which is a symptom of Depression.
Perhaps there were Also Sleep Obstacles. Doctor Agasa doesn't quite Understand Mental Illness, But he Understands.
Once the pessimistic Emotion of Depression Patients surges into their Heart, the World will become gray and dark in a Moment. All sorts of pessimistic Ideas surge into their Heart uncontrollably. Some Humans Even If they Know this is not good, But Still cannot Control.
Logically speaking, taking Haibara Ai to See a Professional Doctor would be Better, But he Still wants to Try to Solve it Oneself first.
He Knows the Ideas of those People from the Organization, including Why Gin asked Zhi Ming Fukuyama the Problem he asked.
In the Eyes of those People, he is Crazy Cat, But in his Eyes, People from the Organization more or less all have a bit of Mental Illness, and are the least Qualification to Say about him, Especially Gin that Goods...
The Same Abnormality Behavior, done by a Human without a Diagnosis Record, People will Just Think this Human's Personality is Weird, Behavior is bizarre, Approach is peculiar. But a Human with a Diagnosis Record, As Long As there is A Bit of abnormality, People Subconsciously Will Think - Whether they are having an Illness attack?
Even If A Bit of Difference, A Bit of Transformation, will make People Think in that direction.
Perhaps sometimes there is no Malice, But it Still makes People depressed.
Crazy Cat for a Moment, Crazy Cat for a Lifetime!
He doesn't care how Others See him, But Girl may not be able to bear it.
Moreover, given the Secret Haibara Ai wants to hide Oneself, Even If she goes to find a Doctor, she Also definitely won't Cooperate.
He No Need to Understand the Situation from Haibara Ai Again, and Also Probably Guess the Reason.
Originally, Haibara Ai's only Relatives in this World Died, and she had Already accumulated Negative Emotion in her Heart. Afterwards, the first thing she Realized was Kudo Shinichi, focused on finding that 'Fellow Birds' who Also Shrank. He may not even be able to keep her.
In Haibara Ai's view, Kudo Shinichi and she have the Same Predicament - Shrank, and If discovered by the Organization, they will both face the Organization's pursuit.
Also have the Same Purpose - Recover their Original Body.
Predicament is the Same, Purpose is the Same, so they can serve as a Companion, and Also Think Kudo Shinichi can Understand her, and can Also serve as a Haven.
Rational Analysis, that is Correct.
But she was in the Organization, got used to rational thinking, and ignored emotional factors.
Wait Until she found Conan, After Conan knew her Identity, But rejected her Because of her Identity as a Drug R&D person, Suspected her, Until he knew she was Akemi Miyano's Younger Sister Afterwards, his Attitude only then Transformed.
Actually, from Conan's Stance, he wasn't Wrong. After All, he is Just a seventeen-year-old High School Student, was turned into a Child and Again didn't Know the Method to Recover, so he definitely accumulated frustration in his Heart. Suddenly met People from the Organization, and was the Drug R&D person, found an Outlet to vent, and Will Accuse her carelessly.
Haibara Ai Perhaps didn't Reveal anything, But her only Relatives had Just Died, and the Human she Originally thought would be a Companion rejected her, Suspected her, and Even expressed Emotion of disgust, making her Oneself Also produce Self Suspicion.
Afterwards, Even If Conan gave Recognition to Haibara Ai, But he is Still a High School Student, his Worldview is either Black or White, and Again is a Detective, hates evil like an enemy, particularly Values Life, and cannot tolerate or Understand Crime. And Haibara Ai cannot help Again Realized about her matters in the Organization, how many Humans her Own Drug has killed...
Once Seeing Again, Here is a Group of naive Children, There is a Group of Champion of Justice, and she Will Feel that Oneself is out of place with Others, and then Realized - Oneself Probably won't be accepted, being accepted, is Just Because they don't Understand Oneself's past Darkness.
There was once a Human, No Matter what she was like, she didn't mind, and Will love her the Same. But now that Human is Already Dead.
Black Faction, she has Already left and is being pursued. Red Faction looks Again too righteous and great, Seemingly No Matter which side, it's Wrong. No Matter which side, Will not accept Oneself Again, and has no Place to Belong for Oneself.
This Is the Problem.
There are Also Methods to Solve it.
One Method is, Wait Until Ryusuke Higo Job-hopping from Tokyo NOIR Team to BIG Osaka Team, take Haibara Ai to See Ryusuke Higo's first Normal Competition.
These two teams, one team has Black Jersey, one team has Red Jersey. And when Ryusuke Higo had Just Job-hopping, Tokyo NOIR Team's Fan Think he is a Traitor, and BIG Osaka Team's Fan Also didn't accept him. After going on the field, No Matter how he played, it was all Booing, making it Very Easy to make Haibara Ai associate it with Oneself's Predicament. Wait Until Ryusuke Higo wins Recognition through Oneself's Effort Afterwards, he can Also become Haibara Ai's Spiritual Pillar.
There is Also another Method, Just for him to guide Haibara Ai.
The World in the Eyes of the young man is either Black or White, But Actually, there are Still many Colors existing in the World.
There are many Humans wandering between Black and white, surviving in the Gray World. He is Just one.
Just, Reliance on Others as a Spiritual Pillar, If Oneself hasn't Get Up yet, and the Spiritual Pillar collapses, that Blow is devastating.
Before this, he Still wants to Try Whether he can make Haibara Ai figure it out Oneself.
Haibara Ai was lowering her Head. She Felt Chi Feichei's Still Calm Line of Sight, wanted to Say something, but Again couldn't Say it, lowered her gaze and Say, "You don't Understand..."
"Still not Happy? Then Again tell you a Secret," Chi Feichei had no Method, and actively revealed the Details, "I am July."
Haibara Ai was surprised and raised her Head, Looking at Chi Feichei, "Why Before..."
"Why didn't I tell you, and Also pretended Oneself wasn't?" Chi Feichei continued to Say, "If Say that Professions in the World Also have Colors, Then Bounty Hunter is Gray. Criminals Guarding Against and hate them. Police Actually Also don't quite Trust them, Because they Will help Justice, and Also Will violate Justice. Identity Leak is a Very Troublesome Matter."
Haibara Ai was Be Stunned A Bit. Say So, Bounty Hunter is Really Like That. Even If it was her, Last Time See 'July' Grab Human, what she Thought was Also Whether July Will take the Criminal to do Bad Deeds. "Then Why did you go to be a Bounty Hunter?"
"This Is a Secret, But, Also Because it's interesting," Chi Feichei Say, "I want to make Life have A Bit more other Colors."
Not to mention there is Also a Large Group of Gray Humans, Even If there is Only Oneself, As Long As one lives wonderfully, what Difference do the Others make Again?
Actually, The Colors represented by his Identity are too many. Organization Member counts as Black, Public Safety Advisor counts as Red, His Cheap Old Dad Say Shinchi Group is blue, Undercover Agent Oneself cannot see the light, and Also counts as Gray. Only a Painting Scroll composed like this is interesting.
If you can drift, drift. Only then can you live comfortably.
"You are Bored, right?"
Haibara Ai Half-Moon Eyes Look at Chi Feichei. A Fellow who doesn't lack Money, Originally could have waited to Inherit the Large Corporation, Lifetime of being carefree about food and clothing, But turned Oneself into Gray, ran off to take Danger and Grab Criminal. Is also something else...
But, her Heart Suddenly felt much more comfortable.
Although Thinking this is Very Weird, But she Still Hopes there is Also a Human Beside her who is not so Just.
In That case, Even If they knew about Oneself's past Matter, Will not reject her Because of her Black History, right?
Moreover, Chi Feichei Seemingly doesn't really mind what Others Think, and No Matter Mouri Ran, Conan, or her and those Children, Will not Because Chi Feichei is July, Just deny this Friend.
Friend, Human Heart, Life... she was A Bit confused for a Moment, But Also Realized, Oneself Before Seemingly got stuck in a Dead End, and her Understanding was A Bit one-sided.
Chi Feichei Again Say, "Keep Confidentiality from Others, Especially Conan. He Always causes Troublesome."
Haibara Ai came back to her senses, glanced at Conan There, her Expression relaxed, "Also Correct, He is Just a Troublesome fellow. But, This Is Whether it counts as your biggest Secret? Is it Really Okay to tell me Like That?"
"I Trust you won't Say it out," Chi Feichei Discovery Conan walked Come Over towards this side, Get Up, whispered, "Moreover, This Is Still not my biggest Secret."
Haibara Ai: "..."
This Is not the biggest Secret?
What other Matter is bigger than This?
End of Chapter