Two months on these satellites, and I've been busier than a dragon in a storm. Teaching Tushi, Mengba, and others magic and martial arts was one thing, but keeping up with Duo'er Duo and her girls? Sigh. I regret letting slip, in a post-climax haze, that dual cultivation could speed their training. These past months have been grueling. A man's "bullets" aren't infinite—supply's limited, and fairness is key. Even the six maids, knowing my nature, learned the secret and pounced during our romps, leaving me no escape. They'd have me in bed 26 hours a day if they could! (What? No 26 hours? Ever wonder how 24 hours was set? Same logic.)
"Your Majesty, monitors spotted intruders on our planet," Tushi burst in, reporting. My two months of education paid off—he's mastered "planet" and "monitors." Tell someone primitives could handle tech, and they'd laugh. But under my brilliant leadership, the impossible's possible.
"Hmm, intruders? How many?" I asked, startled. Immortal Realm folks chasing Amaterasu?
"Three. Looks like two pursuing one," Tushi answered clearly.
I pondered. "Alright, go. I'll check it out." I teleported before him, arriving at Tushi's reported spot. Below, on the plain, an old man battled a middle-aged and younger man. Above them, three legendary flying swords clashed, ringing crisply.
The besieged elder shouted, "Hongchizi, Fengchenzi, why the relentless chase? Sure, I, Xiandao, ain't pretty, but I'm not crazy enough to swing that way. Oh, gods, are you after my tens-of-thousands-year virginity?!"
Damn, this guy's a riot. He dodged nimbly under their assault, spouting nonsense while throwing punches. Hongchizi and Fengchenzi, enraged, pushed their swords harder.
Caught off-guard, Xiandao dropped his banter, scrambling. "What, cat got your tongue?" the two mocked, thrilled at his panic.
"Hand over the item, and we'll spare you for old times' sake. Keep resisting, and don't blame us for getting ruthless," they said coldly.
Xiandao, struggling, snapped, "Why should I? I'd give it to anyone but you two!" Spitting blood, he barely repelled their swords.
Hongchizi and Fengchenzi fumed. "Why? You stole it from us!" Fengchenzi, the younger, roared, neck red.
"Kid, don't get cocky. Without your master, you're nothing. So I took it—so what? It's not even yours. You stole it first. If it's returning, it goes to the original owner, not you," Xiandao shot back, silencing the master-disciple duo. Wordless, they charged harder.
Oh, that's the deal. My first glimpse of Immortal Realm brawls—might as well watch. "Boss, you're here! Help me take these two!" Xiandao suddenly spotted me in the sky, calling out slyly.
Another one? I scanned—no fifth presence. Facing Xiandao, I got it. Clever old fox. "Heh, old but sharp," I mused.
Hongchizi and Fengchenzi, seeing Xiandao's glance, thought I was his ally. "With your Godhand Sect's skills, what's your senior brother got?" they sneered, but cautiously backed off, eyeing me. My silent arrival behind them meant I was stronger—or had killer artifacts. Either way, they were wary. Xiandao's top-grade immortal sword already taxed them—another foe was bad news. Fleeing from a weaker foe? If other immortals hear, we're done.
Glancing at me, they nearly had heart attacks. A stunningly handsome man, unsmiling, stared back. This is Xiandao's senior brother?!
They knew Xiandao, an immortal of tens of thousands of years. If I was his "boss," I was older and stronger. Looking twenty with glowing skin? What power! No one knew such a figure.
As Fengchenzi retreated, Xiandao seized the chance to catch his breath. Noticing their shifting expressions, he played it up, wailing to me like I was family: "Senior Brother, you're here! Teach these bullies a lesson. They mock our Godhand Sect's lack of masters. Just use a quarter of the power you used on that old crook Huangguo!"
Damn, this guy's Oscar-worthy. Crocodile tears flowed cheaper than a kitten's. His performance gave me chills, goosebumps rising.
I read their faces—Xiandao had masterfully used me to spook them. Smirking, I watched for their next move.
They were petrified. He beat Huangguo Immortal? Huangguo, a Great Golden Immortal, was famed not just for power but for aiding others—a rarity. Yet a masked man defeated him, the Immortal Realm's biggest news in eons.
Staring at me, they were convinced. If not him, who'd do such a shady thing? Godhand Sect was notorious for underhanded deeds. They must've stolen top cultivation methods, and he mastered them. Why else would Xiandao flee to this remote wilderness?
Their glares at Xiandao could've killed him a thousand times over. Cunning bastard led us to his brother's hideout to silence us. The scenic beauty around meant nothing—they feared death in obscurity. Seeing my sly smile, they agreed: Conspiracy! Run, ban or no ban. Escaping a Great Golden Immortal wasn't shameful.
They bolted, vanishing. Xiandao, seeing them flee, knew they feared me. Time to go. But I might be after his secret text. Escaping Hongchizi and Fengchenzi, he now faced a worse threat.
Run! Xiandao realized he couldn't move—silently bound by my power. Such skill. Despite stolen Godhand elixirs and texts, he was only a Golden Immortal—not top-tier, but one of few.
Rolling his eyes, he chuckled nervously, "Senior, any more business? If not, please lift the ban so I can go."
Not running? What's his trick? He'd used me to scare them off—can't be careless. I wanted to see what he stole to spark such a chase. Play his game? Sure.
Smiling, I said, "Yo, Junior Brother, so formal? Just called me Senior Brother, now Senior? At my place, you can't just leave. If your sisters-in-law heard, I'd look inhospitable. Let's chat at my place, yeah?"
Done for. Xiandao saw my expression—out of the wolf's den, into the tiger's lair. My unyielding demeanor, despite the "invitation," crushed his hopes. No choice. Sighing, he resigned himself. I'm the fish, he's the cleaver.
"Well, Junior Brother?" I asked, eyes narrowed, smiling broadly. Xiandao felt a chilling glint, sensing danger in my politeness. His own tricks taught him that—he'd ruined many with such ploys.
"Heh—heh," he laughed awkwardly. "If Senior Brother insists, I'll obey." "Good, let's go." Without moving, I lifted him with a warm wind, guiding him to a stunning palace.
What power! Xiandao, shocked, trailed me, hoping this "Senior Brother" he'd claimed would be kind. If he kills me, no one'll know. Calling me his brother meant a brother-slaying was unthinkable, even in the Demon Realm. Who'd believe it?
I paused, letting Xiandao "catch up." "What's wrong, Junior Brother? Unhappy at my home?" My mock anger nearly stopped his heart. This guy flips fast. One wrong move, and I'm obliterated. Forcing a smile, he said, "Senior Brother, I was just fretting over what gift to bring my sisters-in-law."
"Oh, my mistake," I nodded. Xiandao felt he'd dodged death, thanking his quick wit. He didn't know I was just toying, curious about his Immortal Realm, not caring otherwise.
Xiandao, unaware, wrestled with his lie. He had to produce gifts for these "sisters-in-law." With my power, only top treasures would do—his life depended on it, saved or not.
Godhand Sect only steals the best. Xiandao agonized over which treasures to part with, each one a pang.
"There's your sisters-in-law," I said, snapping him out of his dilemma. He looked—ahead stood eight breathtaking women, backed by warriors and maids. Which is the sister-in-law? Though obvious, he rasped, hoping against hope, "Which one?"
"The front eight," I said plainly. They were mine, my women. Xiandao's face froze, muttering, "As expected." Darkness took him—he fainted, held by my wind spell, or he'd have plummeted. Not shocked by my "fortune," but by losing eight treasures, his "immortal wife" hoard.
"Husband, who's this?" Duo'er Duo and Duo'er Hua asked, curious. I grinned, "My Junior Brother." My wicked smile told them he was in trouble. As expected, I splashed Xiandao with a water spell. Shivering, he woke.
"Junior Brother, you're up! Meet your sisters-in-law," I said, smiling. That smile, to Xiandao, was demonic. But I hadn't shown killing intent. Prioritizing survival, he forced a grin, greeting each woman, reluctantly handing over a treasure per woman. Heart aching, he parted with them like a hero severing his arm. Why'd I wake now?
I noted Xiandao's stinginess. Old as dirt, still clinging to trinkets. Unbeknownst to me, these top-grade immortal artifacts—Godhand's haul over eons—numbered barely thirty. Losing eight was torture. Any one could spark Immortal Realm wars.
Seeing his grimace, worse than sobbing, the girls hesitated. They glanced at me. I nodded—take them. Xiandao's "pain" delighted me.
As if blind to his agony, I slapped his shoulder. "Junior Brother, great gifts! Your sisters-in-law love them. What's for your Senior Brother?"
Xiandao gaped. He's shamelessly demanding treasures? He'd assumed a Great Golden Immortal like me had elite artifacts, not stooping to beg. Wrong. "Senior Brother… uh, this…" he stammered, face like a funeral.
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