I breathed in and out again, trying to calm my erratic heart from jumping out my chest.
It wasn't working and I was freaking out. Whenever I thought of my wedding day, I always thought of it as something small and quaint and something far away from my hometown where everyone knew me as witch and knew my grandma who never stopped running her mouth about how despicable I was.
It would be in a church somewhere and I would be getting married to a man I loved or at the very least liked. And it would be bright and cheerful and my nerves would be excited nerves.
And I wouldn't fear being murdered because of who I was.
But that was fantasy and this was real life. I was getting married to a werewolf, in the midst of hundreds of other werewolves and I was fearing for my life. I didn't like Kaison, I barely tolerated him asides from being slightly attracted to him and the nerves were definitely because I was sure I was going to be dead before the night ended.
Here's hoping I would be wrong.
"What's wrong, honey?" Dawn's hands were busy performing magic in my hair. She turned me away from the mirror so I wouldn't see myself until the grand reveal. I just smiled wobbly at her and nodded. "I shouldn't have told you that nonsense." She smacks a palm against her forehead. "I don't even know if it's true, Amara, I gossip too much that's want my ma says. Some say she was murdered and some say she killed herself. It's just heresy at this point."
She was just making it worse. "Dawn."
"Sorry, sorry." She went back to focusing on my hair. I went back to obsessively dreading this day. I doubted I could still make a run for it, the twins were still guarding my door. And worn everyone in the castle running around like the Queen had materialized in the halls. I hadn't seen Kaison since he threatened me earlier. I was dreading seeing him now.
"There!" Dawn said and stepped back, pulling me with her. "You look so beautiful!" Her first real compliment, might add. "Turn around and see."
I turned and opened my eyes. The person standing in front of me was different. So different. My dress was this long flowy thing that Dawn had finally agreed on. It was tight around my chest, waist and hips and flowed down onto the floor.
It was a alight cream color with gold lining the waist and the dipping neckline. She'd done my hair so it was down, still curly and big but a headband held it in place. I looked like a Greek goddess. I laughed out loud, cupping my stomach with how hard I was laughing.
I looked so unrecognizable and I would have loved it, if I wasn't staring at impending doom. Dad would have loved it too, he would have teared up and called me his 'puppet all grown up'.
"Oh my heaven's, why are you crying?" Dawn all but shrieked in my face. I didn't even realize I had stopped laughing and started crying."You're going to ruin it!" She had applied kohl and blush and a whole bunch of other things that made me look slightly less frumplled than usual. She appeared beside me again with a cloth in hand and started carefully dabbing away at the tears. "I won't let anyone murder you, Amara. If that's what you're worried about. I promise. I've taken you under my wing as a goddaughter."
I scoffed. We just met hours ago and I was pretty sure she was only a few years older than me. "Thank you, Dawn. But that's not why I was crying."
Dawn stops attacking my face with her cloth. She looks at me with sad eyes. "Then why were you?"
"My dad would have loved to see me in this." I cocked my head, looking at myself through the mirror with watery eyes. "He's dead, and I never thought I'd get married without him there."
Dawn grows thoughtful and before I can say anything again, she pulls me into her embrace. She smells like vanilla and rosemary, and I immediately hug her back. It's like I've been needing this ever since I fell into that portal. I was scared, yes, but I felt slightly better now.
Dawn pulled back and looked into my eyes. "I'll be there for you. And when you're nervous you can just look at me and I'll give you a huge thumbs up."
I smiled, despite myself and I was oddly grateful for having met this unique person. Dawn fixed what needed to be fixed and stepped back, holding her hand to her heart. "Beautiful." She said.
"Thank you." I replied, truthfully. My stomach felt like it was going to bottom out at any moment but I felt stronger now.
Someone knocked on my door and poked a blonde head in, a teasing smile already on his lips. "I hope you're decent."
"Come right in, Elion." I said sarcastically and rolled my eyes.
"Well, well princess." Elion whistled, raking his gaze up and down my body. I blushed automatically, and Dawn narrowed her eyes at him. "You clean up nicely. What's the ocassion?"
"Very funny." I replied. "You look quite nice yourself."
Elion grinned, canines on full display. "It's a normal occurrence, thanks for noticing."
I turned away from Elion and caught Dawn's eyes. She was trying very much not to look at Elion the way I just did. Interesting. "Elion, if you could please escort Amara to the wedding grounds." She said stiffly, looking somewhere abnove his shoulder. Very interesting.
"Sure thing, love. Come on." Elion hooks an arm around mine and leads me out of my room. We walk the hallways and round the staircase and I try not to hyperventilate on the steps. Everything's going to be fine. It's going to be fine.
Unlike the first time I climbed up these magnificent stairs, instead of awe, I'm filled with trepidation. I'm stuck in this endless loop of wondering what's going to happen tonight and everyday after. "Elion?"
"Yes?"
My feet stop on their own accord. Elion must sense my hesitation because he pauses too and casts me a wary glance. "You okay, princess?" He asks again with plain concern on his face and I realize I must look completely horrible if Elion isn't smiling. "What is it?"
"Nothing." I say, because Elion is a wolf. He wouldn't understand. None of them will. I shake my head and make myself stand straight, the last thing I need to do right now is freak out. I need to stay strong and level headed, that's the only way out of this mess. "Let's go."
Elion doesn't say a word after that and leads me out a door I've never seen before. Standing on the other side of it are the twins in wolf form. No matter how many times I've seen werewolves since I first came here, I can't get over how ethereal they look.
The twins' fur are dark brown and even though they're at least taller than me by a couple inches on all fours, I can still recognize the glint in their eyes.
"Which one is Xerxes?" I asked.
One of them widened his large mouth into what resembled a grin. I knew one of them had a slightly crooked nose when they were in human form and it seemed like he had it in wolf form too. Xerxes. And the one with the crooked nose was Xanthus.
"If you're done princess, get on."
My face echoed the horror I was feeling. "Get on? Like they're horses? Isn't that disrespectful or uncomfortable?"
I snuck a look at the wolves who were now looking bored. Elion gave a short laugh and shook his head in amusement at me. "You weigh next to nothing, princess. And besides if we let you walk, we'd never get there today."
The wolves made a sound that suspiciously resembled laughter. I scowled at all of them and shifted my dress up to allow my hils easy movement. Xanthus lowered him self so his snout was grazing the floor, and I hiked myself over so my legs were hanging on both sides of his body.
"Hold on." Elion warns. Xanthus straightens abruptly and I hold on for my life.
"Where are we going?" I ask. No one answers me and I swallow, gripping Xanthus' fur as tightly as possible. He doesn't seem to even feel me on his body so I guess it wasn't as tight to him. "Don't drop me, okay?"
He howls loud, I take that as a 'no promises', and shoots off. I shut my eyes as the wind slaps my face. If I stare ahead, I'll definitely freak out watching Xanthus run too close to the trees.
After what seems like hours but was just minutes, Xanthus slows down and growls. I untangle myself from the wolf and pat my hair down, my breaths coming out more erratically than usual. Not because of the exhilarating ride I just experienced but because we were in a clearing in the forest overlooking a cliff.
And right at the cliff's edge stood Kaison.