Rin's thoughts churned with impatience. "If they don't make a move soon, I'll go in myself and make them move, with or without mercy," he mused, his mind fixed on the Western powers. "But something tells me they'll act before it comes to that."
He rubbed his temples, exhaustion etched on his face as he settled into his home. A sharp knock broke the silence.
"Enter," he called.
Selvara stepped in, her eyes fierce and tired.
"So, you finally decided to come here?" Rin said, his voice low.
She met his gaze, anger flickering. "Why didn't you kill me? Why? I was just a tool to control this place. You killed my father, why keep me alive? Why this torture?"
Rin offered a small, almost sad smile. "I don't kill for sport. There's a reason for everything, even if you don't see it now." He looked at her with something like regret. "Besides, you've been the closest to me in this world. I know you, everything about you. You're different from the others. You have a kind heart."
He paused, his voice low. "You wanted to kill me, and I can't say I blame you. After all, I did kill your father..."
He softened slightly. "But don't worry, this isn't torture. You don't have the power to hurt or kill me. That's why I'm letting you live."
Selvara stepped forward, her voice trembling with emotion. "Why did you do it? Why did you kill my father?" Her eyes searched his. "When we were together… I saw it. I saw the good in you. So why?"
Rin didn't answer right away. He looked at her, not with anger or arrogance, but with something quiet, something tired.
"I am good, you are not wrong about that," he said finally. His tone was calm, almost matter-of-fact. "I only do this to protect myself. To grow stronger. If I had a way to get stronger without hurting anyone… I would gladly take it."
Selvara's brow furrowed. Her mouth parted, about to say something, but Rin kept going.
"I mainly did it for love."
She blinked, confused. "Love?"
He nodded slowly. "Yes. Because I love myself."
Selvara recoiled slightly, as if slapped by the answer. Her confusion deepened; was he being honest, or mocking her?
Rin's gaze drifted downward, and his voice softened, almost like he was talking to himself.
"When I was young… I was the most talented person. Everyone was cheerful around me. They smiled when they saw me. They believed in me."
He paused.
"But when I started growing up… I stopped living up to their expectations." His jaw tightened. "I was talentless. I was a disappointment."
He repeated it, as if forcing himself to accept it.
Silvara's expression shifted,confusion giving way to something more like concern.
"People started to get away from me," Rin continued, voice low. "My family loved me, though. They protected me. Kept me safe. And I love them too." He shook his head slightly. "But I never felt anything from them. Not really. Not from anyone. I felt like their love could disappear at any moment and I would have nothing left anymore."
His eyes were far away now, locked in memories.
"All my childhood… I kept thinking, 'one day I'll get stronger. One day I'll awaken.' But every day was a disappointment. People I hated, people I looked down on, they were the ones getting stronger. And the worst part?" He scoffed bitterly. "They acted so respectful. They acted like good people."
Selvara stayed quiet, watching him carefully. Her anger hadn't left, but it was dulled now, coated in uncertainty.
"I watched everyone grow more popular," Rin said, his voice hollow. "More powerful. While I stood on the sidelines. Just clapping. Just cheering for them. And slowly, I started to hate myself. I started to doubt myself. Even when someone asked me to do something, I'd say, 'I don't know.'"
He looked down.
"As time passed… I couldn't even look people in the eye anymore. I was ashamed of myself. I couldn't bear it."
Silvara's eyes softened. For a brief second, something almost like pity flickered there.
"The more I hated myself… the more I thought: if I'm not number one, if I'm not the center of everything… then why do I exist?" His voice was calm now. Flat. "My mom used to tell me I should find good people. Make friends. Have a family. Just live happily."
A pause.
"But I couldn't do that," he said. "From the day I was born, I dreamed of being number one. Of being the strongest."
His throat tightened. His voice dropped.
"Seeing that dream crushed… that hurt me the most. And watching the people I hated succeed, watching them be remembered while I was forgotten, that made me hate everything even more."
Selvara didn't interrupt. She looked at him like she didn't quite know who he was anymore.
"Then an accident came," Rin went on, voice quiet and steady. "Monsters attacked a child… and I was at my lowest. The deepest pain I had ever felt."
His hands curled into fists.
"And I thought to myself… 'A friend? I should call a friend,' but then something inside me screamed, the child in me said to me, 'If I couldn't do it, then who would?' That moment, I refused my weakness. I rejected the doubt inside me. And I clung to one question: If I, Rin Solas, couldn't do it, then who would?"
He stepped forward slightly, voice rising, not in anger, but in conviction.
"If a random person could become the strongest… why couldn't I? Why shouldn't I be the one?"
Silvara's lips parted, but she said nothing.
"But I was faced with disappointment again," Rin said, breathing out through his nose. "I lost."
His voice dropped again.
"But I didn't regret it. Because the world, the one that left me alone, that left me weak and unprotected, it didn't deserve me. I left it. I left, without any doubt in my heart."
Selvara stared at him, confused and shaken. She didn't understand what he meant.
"And they're probably right," Rin continued, voice softer now. "The families of the people I killed. I've killed a lot of people. Probably hundred of thousands.they think i am a monsterand they are absolutely right about that"
"Maybe I am cruel. Maybe I'm everything they say. But I'm not lost anymore. I've made peace with the monster I became."
Silvara flinched slightly at that.
"And I won't disappoint myself anymore."
He looked her in the eye, calm, but not cold.
"Maybe I'm cruel. Maybe I'm wrong. But I stopped living for others a long time ago. I won'tdisappoint that child in me."
She was shocked at his arrogance and self-centeredness. She broke down crying, convinced there was no point in talking with him, and gave up. Suddenly, she pulled out a knife, ready to end it all. But something inside her pulsed, holding her back.
Rin's voice cut through the silence. "The blood I left in you… it's already fused with you. You're completely under my control. You can have everything you want in this world, but you can't leave. You can't leave for two reasons: one, to keep unity in my region, and secondly, because no one can have what is mine. What would the world say about me, that I am a cuck?" Silvara left, deeply saddened.
---------
The next morning, Rin woke to news that the combined forces of the South and West had launched a successful attack on the East. He paused, realizing they had targeted one of Valin's domains. "Huh," he thought, "they really hate Valen. Makes sense, given all the destruction he caused."
Rin sat down with Arkan and Dren to discuss the attack. Arkan looked serious as he said, "I think this strike is a distraction. They want us to believe they're hitting the East, but I'm pretty sure their real target is the North."
Dren frowned, asking, "Why do you think that?"
Arkan shrugged. "Just a feeling. The North is too important for them to ignore, especially since our main forces are tied up in the East. They'll likely throw everything they have at the North."