You'd think picking a few pictures would be easy, right?
Oh, you sweet, innocent soul. You have no idea. You take one step into the infinite ocean of online artworks, and suddenly you're lost at sea. Every single time I thought I'd found the one, not even a minute later I'd find another and be like, "Damn, this one's even better!"
It's a vicious, soul-crushing cycle.
And don't even get me started on the... ahem... the more "steamy"... cough... the more "cultured" artworks. Man, that stuff is like a black hole. It's an abyss that sucks your soul in, whispers sweet nothings about "artistic anatomy," and never, ever lets go.
Anyway, for the sake of my own sanity, I finally just had to pull the trigger and select these pictures.
But the journey doesn't have to end with me! If you find a picture that you think is a perfect fit for one of the characters, please share it! Think of this place as our sacred hub, a community center for sharing "Culture."
*****
Lothar von Habsburg
Introduction: Our hero, who traded late-night coding sessions and lukewarm coffee for a suit of armor and a serious lack of indoor plumbing.
After dying from overwork (a true modern tragedy), this ex-CEO got a second chance in an era where the average life expectancy is "maybe Tuesday," as a noble with a cheat code: a gacha system for summoning legendary weirdos to fight for him.
His management style involves a lot of winging it, making grand promises, and hoping his ridiculously overpowered HR disasters don't burn the place down before he can turn a profit. He also gets easily distracted from his goals by the urge to pull "just one more" retainer from his magic credit card.
Appearance: He's a 6'3" walking, talking romance novel cover. Basically, he looks like he stepped right out of a historical romance novel, which is probably very confusing for everyone who knew his rugged, Scarface dad.
He cleans up well, but after a battle, he mostly just looks like a walking mud puddle with great hair. After a battle, he somehow manages to look like a ruggedly handsome hero from an action movie, even when covered in mud, blood, and the questionable stew they had for lunch.
*****
Banu
Introduction: The literal Gatekeeper of Hell and Lothar's first gacha pull, that probably used up all of Lothar's luck for the next century.
She's a 6-Star Legendary tank who's basically an indestructible, unmovable object. Her job is to stand in front of pointy things so Lothar doesn't have to, a task she performs with the silent, stoic dedication of a high-end refrigerator.
She's also Lothar's unofficial therapist, mostly by just standing there and listening to his existential crises.
Appearance: A top-tier waifu who looks like she just rode her Harley out of the underworld.
She's got the "ice queen" vibe perfected, with flawless skin, long black hair, and a stare that could freeze lava. She's tall, gorgeous, and has an expression that says "I am not paid enough for this shit."
Her default outfit is a ridiculously cool (and probably cold) black leather biker suit, but she'll begrudgingly wear normal clothes to avoid freaking out the peasants.
*****
Fringilla Țepeș
Introduction: The team's resident gremlin and 5-Star magical nuke. A vampire loli who's equal parts adorable and terrifying. She's a magical glass cannon who thinks blood is a tasty beverage.
She has a serious one-sided beef with Banu and sees Lothar as a combination of a pet, a snack, and a potential husband.
She is the HR department's worst nightmare. Lothar basically has to be a part-time babysitter to keep her from causing an international incident.
She's a brat, but she's his brat.
Appearance: Looks like a pocket-sized goth girl on the cover of a goth-pop album. She's tiny, with snow-white hair, red eyes and a fashion sense that screams "it's not a phase, Milord!"
She can also sprout a pair of winding horns, just in case you forgot she's a literal demoness.
She hates wearing "ugly" medieval clothes and would rather be fighting demons in her designer gear.
*****
Hans von Sego
Introduction: Started as a 1-Star cinnamon roll, too pure for this sinful world. Then Lothar gave him a "special protein shake," and now he's a 5-Star werewolf.
He's still a sweetheart who gets flustered easily, but now he can also rip your throat out. Talk about a glow-up.
He's trying his best to be a good knight, a good werewolf, and a good subordinate, and is probably very, very confused most of the time.
Appearance (Human Form): The poster boy for a Germanic knights' recruitment pamphlet. He's got the golden hair, the handsome face, and the shiny armor. He even has a helmet with cool-looking horns, because why not?
He looks like the hero who's supposed to save the princess, but he's actually the sidekick to the guy with the gacha addiction.
Appearance (Werewolf Form): A giant, fluffy killing machine. When he transforms, he becomes a giant, silver-furred wolf-man who's all teeth, claws, and teenage angst. He's still figuring out how to use this body, so he's basically a very large, very confused, and very deadly puppy who just discovered it can break down doors.
*****
Marlus
Introduction: The blacksmith she tells you not to worry about.
This 4-Star absolute unit is a master craftsman who could probably forge a legendary sword using another, slightly smaller sword as a hammer. He's a man of few words and many, many muscles.
He's the guy who forges everyone's plot armor and probably uses anvils as pillows.
Appearance: Built like a brick... house. Two meters of pure, unadulterated beefcake who looks like he eats dumbbells for breakfast. He's usually shirtless, because when you're that ripped, shirts are just a suggestion.
His goddamn biceps have their own zip code.
*****
Father Uldin
Introduction: The designated party pooper. This 4-Star priest is a former Archbishop who is not amused by Lothar's collection of supernatural problem children. He's the healer of the group, which is awkward because he probably wants to smite half his teammates.
He's constantly torn between his duty to Lothar and his powerful urge to douse everyone in holy water and see if they sizzle.
Appearance: Looks like he just stepped out of a very serious, very British period drama. He's got the stern face, the neat white hair, and a general "I'm surrounded by idiots" expression.
Carries a Bible that's thick enough to double as a weapon, and he probably knows it.