Joe looked at me like he expected an answer.
Like I owed him one.
But I stayed quiet.
Not because I was speechless.
Not because what he said hit some deep part of me I didn't understand.
I stayed quiet because I knew exactly why I didn't want to go back, and I knew exactly how it was going to sound.
Pathetic. Selfish. Ungrateful.
But fuck it.
"I don't want to go back," I said.
"I don't want to go back because this is the life I always wanted."
His expression shifted—cautious now. Curious, maybe. But still silent.
"My life back there? It wasn't tragic. I wasn't abused. I wasn't living on the streets. My parents were alive. I had friends. I was in college. From the outside, things probably looked fine. Maybe even good. Better than what a lot of people get. And yeah, I know that. I get it."
I looked away from him.
"But I hated that world."
I let the words hang in the air.
"Not every second of it," I continued. "There were good moments—laughing with friends, late-night games, dumb jokes. Getting drunk and high as shit. A few memories I'll always keep. But overall? It felt wrong. All of it. I woke up every day feeling like I was sleepwalking. Going to classes I didn't care about. Building a future I didn't even want."
I scoffed under my breath.
"Every night I stood in that fucking dish pit. Until one in the morning. Soaking fucking wet.Water down my arms. Fingers wrinkled, back aching. Then I'd go home, sleep four hours, and do it all over again."
I clenched my jaw.
"I knew it wouldn't be forever. I'm not stupid. I studied hard. I worked harder. Eventually, I'd make money. Maybe even a lot of it. Travel a bit. See the world. Start a family. Do all the things people dream of."
I paused, then shook my head.
"But why would I want that?"
Joe looked confused now. Not offended. Not angry. Just... trying to understand.
"Sure, I could live that life. White picket fence. Dog in the yard. Happy photos on social media. It wouldn't even be bad. Just... empty. No matter how rich or poor you are, you do all this stuff—work, love, suffer—and then you die. That's it."
"That's why I read fantasy novels. That's why I watched anime. Why I got obsessed with manga and games and all that stupid shit that made people roll their eyes. Because in those worlds, I felt something. I imagined a life where I wasn't a background character. Where I could fight ghosts. Or monsters. Or a fucking demon king. Where I could go on an adventure. Find a purpose. Get the girl. Save the world."
I looked up again.
"And yeah, maybe I'd still end up feeling empty at the end. Maybe it's all the same in the long run. But at least this world has fucking magic."
"I'm trying to be a hero," I said quietly. "I'm trying to be the chosen one. For the first time in my life, I feel alive. I feel like i have a purpose, I'm not just killing time until the end."
I took a deep breath.
"I want to live this life. Even if it means leaving everything and everyone behind. Even if it makes me scum."
I turned back to Joe, trying to fake a smile. Trying to ease the tension.
I chuckled.
"Basically what im saying is I dont want to wash dishes anymore."
Omar stopped pacing.
His panic had faded—not completely, but enough for him to process what I'd said. He stared at me like he was trying to solve a puzzle that didn't make sense.
Then he grinned. "Bro... stop trauma dumping."
We all cracked up. Even Joe chuckled, just a little.
I laughed with them, but mine felt like glass breaking inside. Hollow. Sharp.
Omar pointed at me, still grinning. "You one depressed ass motherfucker, man. Damn."
He let out a low whistle, then shook his head. "I mean... I kind of get it, but not really. I like my life. It's hard, sure, but I've got two daughters back home. Shit might get messy, but it ain't pointless. When I wake up, I know why I'm waking up."
He looked at me and shrugged. "Can't relate to that empty feeling. Never felt it. Not even once."
Joe scoffed, stepping forward with his hands in his pockets.
"No, fuck that," he snapped, eyes locked on me. "That's the dumbest shit I've ever heard. You basically just said you could live a good life—a real one, with people who love you—but instead you'd rather be in a fantasy world where you could DIE every damn day just to feel a little bit of excitement?"
He gestured around, face twisted. "What the fuck is wrong with you?"
I didn't answer. Just looked away.
This is why guys don't vent their problems. Even to other guys.
Sito, finally spoke. "Chill out, bro. We don't know how he feels. We haven't lived his life."
Joe scoffed again. "His life sounds pretty fucking good to me. Family, friends, a promising future, a world not filled with monsters called the 'Maw Born'"—he made air quotes, voice thick with sarcasm—"What fucking more could you ask for?"
I turned back toward him, face blank. "Magic."
There was a beat of silence.
Joe rubbed his face with both hands and turned away. "Nah. Y'all are trippin."
Omar stepped forward now, glancing at the rest of the people still standing around us—soldiers, robed figures, and the princess who hadn't said a word since all this started.
"Look, man. Y'all can do what you want, but you gotta send me back. I'm not about to fight no fucking monsters. I'm not built for that shit."
I turned too, finally facing the crowd. The question that'd been scratching at the back of my mind since the moment they said we were summoned came out before I could stop it.
"Is there even a way back?"
The room shifted. Not physically, but the air felt heavier. Thicker.
That cold, piercing stare hit me first—from the princess. She still hadn't given us her name. Hadn't even introduced herself. Probably didn't respect us enough to.
Now that I was really looking, I realized it wasn't just her. Everyone in the hall was looking at us with the same expression.
Disgust. Contempt.
She didn't answer my question. Instead, she turned to the robed wizard who had cast the summoning spell.
"These men are pathetic," she spat. "Not only are they not warriors, but one of them is a coward, one of them is disillusioned enough to believe he's going to live a dream life in our world, one of them only wants to stay to have fun, and the last won't fight because he has a family."
She turned back to us, icy and calm. "Yes. We can send you back. But it will take a week to prepare the ritual."
Omar and Joe let out a long, relieved sigh almost in sync.
But she wasn't finished.
"If the Maw Born were to come to your world... would you fight?"
Her eyes locked on Joe.
"You said you have no one. No ties. Essentially living only for yourself. If they invaded your world... would you step up there? Would you protect someone other than yourself?"
Joe stared at her for a moment, his jaw clenched. Then he answered without hesitation.
"No. I wouldn't. I'm not gonna fight to save the whole world. I'm not some righteous hero. Who do you think I am—Superman?"
He scoffed. "Nah. I'd build enough power to protect myself—and maybe a few other people. That's it."
The princess's face remained unreadable. No anger. No resentment. Just... blank.
Then she turned to Omar.
"I understand why you must return. And we apologize for taking you away from your children."
We were all stunned.
Did she just apologize? I thought.
He must not have the same title as me.
No one said a word.
Then she looked at Sito. "And you..."
She tilted her head slightly. "Why are you here? You said it was to have fun? If thats the case, you should return to your world as you will not have fun here. The only thing you will find here is blood, heartache, and death.
Sito stared at her and didn't say anything.
The princess turned away and her eyes fell on me.
"You..." she said. Then paused.
"You are pathetic."
The word hit like a slap.
She stepped closer. "You said you wanted to stay because this is the life you always wanted. I told you—our world is at war. And you think you're going to come here and 'save the world and get the girl'? You are the most selfish one here."
Her voice never rose. That's what made it worse.
"The one you refer to as Joe has no one waiting for him. If he chose to stay for personal glory, it would still be repulsive—but at least understandable. You, on the other hand... You have people. People who love you. Care for you. A life of peace. And you would abandon all of it."
A pause.
"Not for righteousness. Not for duty. But because you don't like your peaceful life."
I didn't speak.
No one did.
"We will train you. We will accept your help. But make no mistake..." Her voice was colder now than it had ever been.
"You are not fit to be a hero."
The silence stretched on.
Then she turned her back to us.
"A guard will escort you to your rooms. Your training begins tomorrow."