Status: lying on the floor with one sock, two granola bars, and 83 unread thoughts.
GROUP CHAT: 🧃"COZY DEATH CLUB"🧃
👤 ayumi_servebot
👤 minachan
👤 emi.exe
ayumi_servebot:
update: my doubles partner is a sad calculator with great bone structure and zero tolerance for joy 😇🎾
emi.exe:
you mean the forehead guy?? from orientation??
ayumi_servebot:
YES THAT ONE
kenji "i schedule my feelings quarterly" nakamura
coach paired us up
as in "together"
as in "he has to look at me daily until we either win a match or go to therapy"
minachan:
does he hate you yet or are we still flirting with the concept of enemies-to-lovers?
ayumi_servebot:
he's flirting with the concept of loathing
i'm flirting with his inability to process unstructured social interaction 😌
emi.exe:
was he mean?
ayumi_servebot:
no
he was polite
and tense
like a microwave about to explode
he didn't even react when i complimented his forehead
do you know how emotionally walled-off you have to be to ignore a sincere forehead compliment??
minachan:
so… you like him?
ayumi_servebot:
EXCUSE ME
i like annoying him
it's different
it's an art form
emi.exe:
but you're texting about him
at 11:24pm
while lying on your floor again, aren't you
ayumi_servebot:
you don't know my life
emi.exe:
you sent us a picture. your granola bar is under your neck like a pillow.
ayumi_servebot:
fine okay yes
but listen
he's all bottled-up tension and quiet competitiveness and intense eye contact
and he plays like he's solving an emotional equation he doesn't want anyone to see
and i don't know why but that makes me want to
i dunno
poke it
lightly
with a racket
emotionally
minachan:
girl.
ayumi_servebot:
shhhh
don't "girl" me
this is science
emi.exe:
this is your heart, actually
ayumi_servebot:
nope. just tennis. just chaos. just recreational emotional sabotage
emi.exe:
and if he ever smiles?
ayumi_servebot:
i'm suing