Hazy neon signs flicker, and near a flower bed, a woman holding a bottle of Pulsin glances around nervously, as if waiting for someone. Her hands clutch the bottle, twisting it back and forth, while the heels of her stilettos click-clack against the cobblestones.
She pulls her phone from her bag to check the time. Just then, a man with slightly disheveled hair and a cigarette dangling from his lips spots her. He takes a deep drag, crushes the butt, and flicks it into a nearby trash can with precision.
"Hey~! Beauty~!" he calls, approaching her. He notices the Pulsin in her hand and smirks knowingly. The woman, blushing furiously, raises her hand to slap his chest.
He steps back, grinning mischievously. "Got time?"
"Uh-huh," she nods shyly. He casually drapes his arm around her shoulders, and the two walk into the nearby Night Breeze Inn like a couple.
The next morning, a woman's sharp, terrified scream shatters the dawn's tranquility.
Minutes later, sirens wail as a police car pulls up outside the Night Breeze Inn. Soon, a body covered in a white sheet is carried out.
Inside the police car, the woman sobs uncontrollably, recounting the events of the previous night in fragmented sentences.
"I told him not to take so much, but he wouldn't listen… sniff…"
In a world of darkness, nothing seems to exist, yet there's a suffocating pressure.
I might be the first man in history to die from overdosing on Viagra…
Don't people lose consciousness when they die? Am I a ghost now? Something feels off… Sensing the pressure around me, I instinctively struggle, and from somewhere both far and near, I hear Japanese.
"Ah!"
"Kushina! What's wrong?"
"Minato, the baby's kicking me~! Such a lively child!" Kushina gently rubs her swollen belly, her face glowing with the anticipation of motherhood and love for the child within.
Holy sht!
Kushina?!
Minato?!
Even without understanding Japanese, as someone who spends most of their time with computers and anime, I barely catch a few words.
Could it be…
This is the Naruto world? I hooked up with someone and ended up here? As the protagonist?!
The Nine-Tails watches the infant flailing its arms excitedly, its ears twitching, eyes narrowing.
"Strange…"
The Nine-Tails examines the baby in Kushina's womb. Thin, hair-like red chakra wraps around the infant's arms and flows into its abdomen through the umbilical cord.
"It's nothing like before. Suddenly so lively. What's going on?" The Nine-Tails studies the motionless, curled-up infant curiously.
Fck! Why is the Nine-Tails interested in me? I'm just an innocent, weak little baby! Go bother Minato Namikaze and Kushina Uzumaki! Leave me out of this!
The "motionless" infant thinks to itself.
The Nine-Tails watches for a moment, yawns lazily, and hums, losing interest in the "dead" infant. What it doesn't know is that its chakra has caused abnormal changes in the unborn child's body. The already-formed reproductive organs have undergone bizarre transformations under the influence of the Nine-Tails' chakra.
The Nine-Tails' chaos arrives with Kushina's labor.
As the Nine-Tails' jinchūriki, Kushina's seal weakens during childbirth, and someone seizes the opportunity to steal the Nine-Tails from her.
Kushina, drenched in sweat and with dark circles under her eyes, lies weakly on a stone bed, gazing at the newborn infant with a satisfied smile.
A jinchūriki whose tailed beast is extracted dies instantly, but as a member of the Uzumaki clan, Kushina's vitality keeps her alive—for now.
In the distance, a massive creature appears—a red-furred, nine-tailed fox, the very Nine-Tails sealed within Kushina.
Its colossal form sends shockwaves with every slight tail flick, and its footsteps shake the earth. Konoha's ninjas are powerless against this monster. Their attacks are futile, and they can only curse helplessly as they fall to the Nine-Tails' rampage.
"Kushina!"
Minato Namikaze breaks free from the masked man claiming to be Madara Uchiha and rushes to Kushina's side. Seeing her weak state, his heart aches, but there's no time for them now.
"Minato…" Kushina takes a deep breath, struggling to lift her numbing hand to cradle the infant. "She's our child…"
"Minato, name her…"
"Naruto."
Minato gently holds Kushina, stroking the baby's rosy cheeks.
"A beautiful name…" Kushina smiles, watching the infant nestled in Minato's arms. Though she's long doubted his naming skills, this time, it's unexpectedly fitting.
"Kushina…" Minato closes his eyes, pained, then turns to face the Nine-Tails. "We're running out of time."
"Why Naruto? She's just a baby. Why burden her…"
"Hokage-sama, the Nine-Tails is growing more ferocious! Time's up!" A masked ANBU warns.
"I know!"
Naruto, cradled in Kushina's arms, struggles to open her eyes—large and azure. The first thing she sees is the monstrous Nine-Tails, like something out of a tokusatsu show.
So this is the Nine-Tails. It's huge!
Wait… Does this mean the Nine-Tails will be sealed inside me?! Fck!
"Naruto…"
Kushina looks at the awake infant, tears streaming down her face and onto Naruto's.
"I'm sorry, Naruto. Mommy can't watch you grow up…"
So this is my… mom… Huh? What's she crying about? I can't understand a word! But she looks so sad…
Naruto lifts her tiny head, gazing at the tearful, exhausted woman. She reaches out, babbling, trying to wipe away Kushina's tears.
Suddenly, Kushina's hand glows blue. She channels her remaining life force into Naruto through a secret technique.
"Naruto, forgive me…"
Kushina collapses in Minato's arms, lifeless. Her grip on Naruto slips away.
"Waaaaahhhh!!!"
Naruto, who hasn't cried since birth, wails in unprecedented sorrow.
"Kushina…"
Minato gently lays her down, holding the crying Naruto as he rushes into battle.
As the Nine-Tails looms larger, and its hand reaches for her, Naruto screams.
"Waaaaahhhh!!! Stay away from me!!!"