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Returning from a school trip is like waking up from a fun dream and realizing your room still smells like instant noodles and your homework is untouched.
I walked into school Monday morning, half-asleep, emotionally scarred by goat chases and Jun-Pyo's near-confession.
He, on the other hand, arrived with sunglasses and headphones, acting like he just returned from filming a drama.
"Dude, you okay?"
Jun-Pyo sighed. "I've decided to rebrand myself. From today, I'm no longer the fool who complimented symmetry. I'm… mysterious now."
> "If I speak less, maybe they'll think I'm deep. Like a K-pop idol with hidden pain."
"Or they'll think you're constipated."
He glared. "Haters gonna hate."
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First Period: The Bathroom Bombshell
Just as I sat down in class, nature called with terrifying urgency.
I dashed to the restroom with Olympic-level speed, praying no one was inside.
Alas, fate had other plans.
I froze in front of a closed stall.
> "Once I become principal, I'm going to fire all the teachers and replace them with AI. Except the lunch lady. She stays."
Wait… that voice. I peeked under the stall door.
It was our vice principal.
He was sitting there, mumbling revolution plans while… taking care of business.
> "And then I'll delete exams from existence. These kids have suffered enough."
What was this? A diary entry? A coup plan? A digestive monologue?
He suddenly shouted, "DOWN WITH GRADES!"
I bolted before I became a witness in a future court trial.
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Lunch: Blackmail Season Begins
Back in the cafeteria, I sat down with my tray and realized the phone had been buzzing all morning like an angry bee.
> "Kim Ji-Hoon knows everything. Everything."
"He's acting suspicious. Like he has a wiretap in his eyebrows."
"If he exposes my secret crush, I'll shove him in a locker."
Uh-oh.
Apparently, word had gotten around.
Too many coincidences. Too many near-spoilers.
Someone suspected I was psychic. Or possessed. Or… an undercover dating consultant.
I casually scrolled through the phone settings.
"Hey," I whispered, "is there a stealth mode or something?"
> "You want stealth? Toss me into a river. Or stop reading people's love thoughts like they're webtoon spoilers."
"Too late."
Then, Minji sat across from me with her tray.
She leaned in and smiled sweetly.
"I heard you knew about the goat before it happened."
Gulp.
Jun-Pyo, seated next to me, dropped his spoon.
"You knew? You knew?! You let me CHASE IT?!"
> "Oh no. I just exposed myself. Wait… maybe I can blackmail him."
Minji narrowed her eyes playfully.
"Ji-Hoon... are you some kind of wizard?"
I forced a laugh. "Me? A wizard? I still don't know how to use the rice cooker at home."
She didn't buy it.
> "He's hiding something. But it's... kinda hot?"
My spoon fell.
Right into my soup.
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Meanwhile, At Home: Bora's Boy Trouble
That night, I came home to find Bora, my little sister, standing on the balcony like she was in a melodrama.
Wind blowing. Arms folded. The full tragic heroine package.
"What now?"
She turned slowly. "Oppa… I think he blocked me."
"…Who?"
She held up her phone. On the screen was a photo of a boy with shaggy hair, big headphones, and the caption:
'Gamer Boi So-Woo 💀🔥'
"I commented on his selfie: 'So handsome~ 💕' and now he's private and not replying."
> "I KNEW I should've just liked it and walked away! UGH!"
I laughed so hard I fell onto the couch.
She threw a slipper at me.
"It's not funny! This was real love!"
> "Now I have to live with this shame forever. I'll move schools. Maybe countries."
"You can't even afford your own banana milk, Bora."
She groaned, stormed off, and slammed the door.
The phone buzzed softly.
> "Your sister needs therapy. Or a rice cracker. Maybe both."
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The Final Straw: Jun-Pyo's One Brain Cell Fails Again
I texted Jun-Pyo that night.
Me: Don't say anything suspicious at school tomorrow.
Jun-Pyo: Why? Did Minji find out about your magical lie detector phone?
A second later, the phone buzzed.
> Warning: Someone has mentioned you AND the phone in a group chat. Damage control advised.
I groaned.
"Tomorrow's going to be a mess."
> "You think today was bad? Just wait till someone starts a rumor that you're dating the lunch lady for extra fishcakes."
I cried a little. Just a little.
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