I know I've said before how Susan has the worst table manners I have ever seen, but you're a close second." Sam grimaced as he leaned against the cushioned backrest of the booth to be as far away from me as possible.
"Be quiet. You're not the one who has been stuck in the hospital for over a day eating their idea of food." I said while stuffing my mouth full with my second burger, which I had just bought.
"Oh poor you. One whole day of poor quality food." The sarcasm in his voice was so thick it seemed almost physical. "Which one of us still has to eat those god forsaken school lunches?"
"Fair enough, you have it worse. Is that what you wanted to hear?" I smirked as I moved on to my third burger, having already managed to demolish my second.
"Glad you think so as well." He replied, making me roll my eyes in exasperation.
"So… Are you finally going to tell me what actually happened during the fight? How did Derek just show up out of nowhere? Not that I'm complaining, mind you."
"I believe you have those two who were watching from the sidelines to thank for that." As I sat there, it took me a second to realise who he was referring to.
"You mean Alice and Clark?" I snorted derisively, "Yeah, right. Those two are way too scared to go against Jamie. They wouldn't dare. I should know, I've seen it first hand." I muttered, getting irritated at just the memory of how they hadn't helped when I was getting the ever loving shit kicked out of me the first time.
Sam simply shrugged his shoulders, ignoring the waves of contempt rolling off me. "Don't know what to tell you. One second, that muscle-bound freak is about to beat you to a pulp with a metal pipe. The next, that bloke Derek is running towards us telling them all to piss off with the other two tailing behind him."
Seeing he was serious, I suddenly found myself feeling torn. On the one hand I was still pissed off at them, something I doubted would ever change, at least not in the short time I had left. However, on the other hand, if what Sam said was true, then I doubted if it wasn't for them, I would still be alive, or at least not in nearly as good a shape as I currently was.
Eventually, I simply decided to stop thinking about it, realising nothing was going to change by overthinking what had happened. "Whatever, at least everything turned out well in the end. Or as well as it realistically could be." Sam just gave me a long, hard stare in response, letting me know his exact thoughts on the subject before he resumed eating. An action I soon swiftly copied.
"Oh yeah, what did you tell Helen? You didn't mention my condition, did you?"
"Relax. I just told her the truth, minus the part about your condition, of course. I said you had a few bruised ribs, but besides that, you're a-okay."
"Thank god." I sighed in relief, going back to devouring the portion of fries scattered on my tray, at least I tried to before the stare boring its way through my head forced me to look up. "What?" I finally said to the impassive expression worn by Sam.
"Mate I know it's not my place but you should really tell Helen the truth. Do you really want to spend the next couple of months constantly lying about your health?" Sam said. Ironically not realising I was already lying to him, having not told him about what I had just found out about my health.
"And besides." Sam continued, unaware of my thoughts. "She's definitely starting to get suspicious that something is up. I mean she would have to be a moron not to notice how you have started to wheeze and cough every few minutes. And I don't think the way I reacted like you were going to die after the fight helped much either."
In response, I simply released a sigh, knowing what he said was true. After all, I would have had to be blind not to notice the continued stares Helen had started giving whenever I went into one of my coughing fits. "What am I going to do? How can I just tell her that I'm going to die? I've only just started to accept it myself, and I've had months to come to terms with it."
"Well, you can't keep lying to her. She's going to find out eventually."
"Actually, I might have a way where she won't find out the truth." I replied, remembering the train of thought I had possessed a few days prior.
"And that would be?" Sam asked curiously.
"We break up."
"...What?"
"We break up," I repeated. "Think about it. That way, she won't see me as I get sicker and won't even know when I pass away."
I looked at him expectantly, quite proud of the idea I had come up with. However, Sam simply sat there without a reaction, completely frozen. It was only when I began to panic, thinking something might be wrong, that he all but exploded out of his seat, his voice a loud bellow, attracting the multiple patrons in the McDonald's to our attention.
"Are you fucking insane! How in god's green earth did you think such an idiotic plan was a good idea?"
"Well, what other choice do I have! I'm going to die. There's no changing that." I replied in agitation before letting loose a long, depressed sigh at the mention of my death. Every time I brought it up, it was like a piece of my soul got chipped away, draining me of my energy and emotions.
"God, I shouldn't have even started a relationship when I knew I was going to die. It was fucking idiotic of me." I muttered, more to myself than to Sam. "However, I did, there's no changing that. At least this way she will only be sad for a few days from the break-up and not scarred for life because of my death."
Sam just shook his head in response. "You could always just be honest. Helen's a lot stronger than you give her credit for. You should have seen the damage she dealt to that girl she and Susan were fighting. No doubt she's currently sporting a nasty black eye."
"Maybe you're right, but why risk it? At least this way I know she'll be alright in the end." With that and having made up my mind I pulled out my new phone, a cheap second hand flip phone that was originally my fathers. With it I swiftly sent her a message, asking her to meet up in the morning the next day.
"There. I asked her to meet tomorrow at ten." It was then, just as I went to put my phone back in my pocket, Sam's amused expression caught my attention.
"What?"
"Mate, I don't know if you remember, but there's this thing called school. Happens from morning till evening, five days a week. Ring any bells? I think she might be a bit too busy to meet up tomorrow, since, ya know, it's a Tuesday."
"Shit" I muttered a few moments later, my head planted flat on the table as I wondered how I could possibly have forgotten about school. "Wait a second," I said, springing back up to attention. "If tomorrow is Tuesday, then that means today is Monday."
"Nothing ever gets past you Sherlock." Sam quickly dodged the chip I threw towards his head, making the smug smile on his face even more unbearable.
"As I was trying to say." I continued with a huff. "If today is Monday, why the hell aren't you at school?"
Sam just stared back, deadpanned. "Mate, you almost died in that fight. If that dude Derek had gotten there even a few seconds later, it could have been all over. I think I can afford to miss one day of school and hang out with you instead." Hearing how earnest he sounded almost brought a tear to my eye.
"I think your parents might disagree with that statement. Do they know you're not at school?" I joked.
"God no." He chuckled. "If they found out, they would probably place a tracking chip on me or something and only let me leave the house to go to school."
Even though he said it as a joke it was clear from his bitter tone that he genuinely thought there was a hint of truth in what he said. Hearing that, and knowing I might not get another chance to talk about it with him again before I was gone, I replied.
"Mate, it's not right. It's fucking ridiculous, no one should be forced to spend as much time as you do on homework and studying. Life's far too short for all that. Trust me, I should know." I added with a smirk. "You need to stop living your life according to them and start living for yourself."
Upon hearing my words, Sam just sat there in silence, lost in thought. A state which I didn't want to interrupt, believing it was something he needed to seriously think about, instead going back to the last remains of my food. It was then a few seconds later, that I heard my phone buzz from my pocket. Which, with lightning fast reactions, I quickly grabbed and opened, seeing the message from Helen that had just come in.
"Well? What did she say?" Sam asked, no longer stuck in thought.
"She said she would see me there." I sighed.
"And you're unhappy about this because…" Sam questioned with his brows furrowed.
"Not unhappy," I replied. "More like resigned. I just wish it didn't have to come to this." I muttered, giving a hard glare towards Sam when I saw he was about to speak up, no doubt in an attempt to try and dissuade me from my plan. In response, he simply held his hands up in a placating gesture before the two of us got back to finishing our food.
However, all I could focus on for the rest of the day, despite Sam's futile attempts to distract me, was the chat I had now planned with Helen. A feeling of heaviness permeated my body, something which, with every thought about Helen, only seemed to worsen.
'It's for the best.' I thought to myself for what must have been the eleventh time, trying to convince myself as doubts began to cloud my mind. 'It's for the best.'