After tidying up my Equipment, I rubbed my dizzy head, which felt congested from my sleeping posture, and walked downstairs. I happened to run into the Fat Boss. Before I could even speak, a Bear Roar came from the side, startling me.
"Oh, Wu, you finally woke up, kid? May the great Barbarian Guardian bless you, you slept like a pig!"
Damn it, I just woke up and was hit by a high-decibel assault! I turned my head and glared. Who else but Doug could be called a human-shaped loudspeaker? Sitting next to him was Geoff, the big silent type. I felt like these two went to extremes with their personalities. One was introverted and couldn't say a word even if you poked him with a stick; the other was garrulous, and if he didn't say enough, he'd wither and turn to ash the next day. How great it would be if these two could complement each other a bit? That would be the most normal Barbarian!
The Fat Boss came towards me, bowing with a smile. "This Druid Lord, ever since you fell asleep the day before yesterday, these Lords have been waiting for you here often."
Really? Doug, that old guy, is actually quite decent. Forget it, I won't Curse your descendants anymore.
But, the day before yesterday??
Does that mean I've been asleep for over a day?
At this moment, Doug's loud voice came over again.
"Haha... Wu, you know what? You actually slept on the floor by the Entrance! I was the one who threw you onto the bed! How about that, am I decent?"
"Threw...?" My tone was questioning, with a hint of strangeness.
"Yeah, just like this..." As if afraid I wouldn't understand, Doug made a gesture of picking something up from the ground with his arm and then lightly swinging it.
Damn it, no wonder there was a part in my dream where I was falling off a cliff! So you were the culprit, Doug! You're truly sinful, you didn't even spare me in my dreams!
I gritted my teeth and looked at the excited Doug. If I wasn't considering his arms and legs, which were thicker than a bull's, I really would have wanted to play a real-life fighting tournament with him.
"Gurgle..."
My stomach inappropriately started rumbling. After sleeping for over a day, anyone would be starving.
"Boss, give me 2 servings, no, 3 servings of Meat Soup."
I said to the boss, "Put the Money on that Barbarian's tab."
I secretly pointed at Doug.
The boss, with his perpetually unchanging smiling face, nodded.
Hoho, dear Uncle Doug, don't blame me...
"Dear Wu, looking at you, it seems you've gone through some very tough Training."
I plopped down casually at Doug and Geoff's table. Big-mouthed Doug couldn't stay idle for a moment and immediately started questioning me.
"Of course! Don't you know who I am? What Fallen, Rotting Corpse, Brute? They're all just small fry! Even Corpsefire, I just swing my Wooden Club and bash him!"
I said proudly.
Doug's eyes lit up. Bragging, bragging is good! I, Doug, love bragging the most!
I saw Doug's eyes suddenly shone with a cunning brightness. My heart sank, knowing things were bad. It seemed my words had served as a trigger.
"Haha, not bad, not bad, you have my style from back in the day! But don't think you can get arrogant just because of that. I'm not afraid to tell you, the adventures I've experienced were tens of thousands of times more dangerous than yours! What? Exaggerating? How can you say that? The entire Rogue Encampment knows that I, Doug, am the most honest person and never bluff! Listen carefully, I remember one time..."
Sure enough, as soon as I finished speaking, Doug started talking non-stop. The beginning was okay, at least he was still fighting through stages and battling the Blacksmith vividly, eventually admiring each other and burying the hatchet with a smile, becoming friends from then on. But later, it became outrageous! At some point, Andariel had recognized him as her boss, Duriel became his mount, Mephisto was his foot-washing and bed-warming maid, even Baal became his personal stablehand! Diablo? Hmph, it was still cleaning toilets at Doug's house! No need to mention the other minor Characters. If it weren't for considering the Angels' prestige, I'm afraid even the head Angel, Tyrael, wouldn't have kept his reputation intact.
Alright, you've stolen all my spotlight, what's the point of sticking around? Someone whose shamelessness was no less than Doug's thought to himself.
Just as Doug was spewing saliva everywhere, the Meat Soup I ordered arrived. A full three servings! You should know, one serving was enough to fill up a 100-kilogram strong man. The amount in these three servings was immense.
"Doug, how about it? Interested in a competition?" I lightly tapped the large plate holding the Meat Soup with a porcelain spoon, looking provocatively at Doug with what I thought was an elegant Gaze. Clearly, I was still holding a grudge about his "kind actions" while I was sleeping.
Doug looked at the three servings of Meat Soup on the table, then looked at me. Unusually, he lowered his voice and said, "You really want to compete? Can't we not compete?"
I shook my head firmly. Hmph, Doug, so you have moments of feeling guilty too? Scared? Now, I'll show you the true terror of a Druid who hasn't eaten for 2 days! I hope it doesn't leave any psychological trauma on you, that would make me feel bad. Oh hoho...
But Doug's next words made my legs go weak, and I almost fell headfirst onto the table.
"Alright, since you're so sincere, I can't refuse. Let's compete. Although I just ate 7 servings of Roast Meat and I'm already very full, if it's just a little bit, I can probably still eat it. But, since we're competing, there should be a stake. Whoever loses pays the bill. Yeah, let's do that."
Saying that, before I could react, Doug immediately turned his head and roared at the Fat Boss, "Boss, give me 5 more servings of Meat Soup!"
At this moment, I had completely turned to ash...
I admit, my brain must have been kicked by a donkey. Competing in eating with a Barbarian is as ridiculous as an Ant trying to compete with an elephant. How laughable! I had a free lunch within reach and could have even quietly tricked Doug, but because of my momentary impulse, not only did I lose the free lunch, I also had to pay for his portion.
I watched Doug contentedly picking at his two rows of stark white teeth with a small toothpick. Damn it, every bit of meat residue on them was my Money! I gritted my teeth in anger—he definitely heard my conversation with the boss just now, which is why he went along with the flow and agreed to compete with me, turning the tables on me. In the end, I was just too naive.
I finally understood the saying "the older the ginger, the spicier it is." Even an honest-looking Barbarian, if they live long enough, will become cunning. Besides, I never thought Doug was honest, not from the moment he was born.
Geoff was on the side from beginning to end, watching us mess around with a stiff smile, not saying a word. Smile, smile, seeing me tricked by Doug and not even giving a warning, you can be considered half an accomplice!
Depressed, I pulled out over 10 Gold Coins and asked with a sullen face, "Can I get a discount?"
Waiter: "..."
Oh right, Doug said, as if remembering something while picking his teeth, "Just now I heard someone calling you a stupid donkey. Did you make enemies so quickly, kid? How about it, need a hand? As long as you provide me with three meals a day."
Damn, if that's the case, I won't even be killed by my enemies, I'll be eaten into poverty by you first! I expressed severe contempt for Doug's shameless behavior.
But how should I explain it? Tell the truth? That would be calling myself a stupid donkey. Great, with big-mouthed Doug around, I guarantee that within half a day, my nickname "stupid donkey" will echo throughout the entire Rogue Encampment, making me famous in no time.
"No choice, when you're handsome, people easily take notice," I said gloomily, tossing my hair with extreme narcissism.
"Tch," Doug expressed extreme disdain for my disgusting action, immediately baring his teeth and rolling his eyes in contempt. Unexpectedly, the toothpick in his hand accidentally poked into his gums because of this, making him writhe in pain. Karma, karma!
"Doug, after I left, you guys haven't left the Rogue Encampment?"
I was half-lying on the chair, completely without image, my stomach bloated. I felt I couldn't continue the in-depth discussion about donkeys, so I performed a Heaven and Earth Great Shift + Shifting Flowers, Connecting Wood. What? Don't understand what that means? Do you know what changing the subject means? Idiot, spank yourself a hundred times.
"Yeah," Doug said leisurely, letting out a burp.
"Tch, contempt for you! As a great Adventurer, you're actually living such a decadent life of drunken stupor!"
"Why can't Adventurers live like this? I think this is exactly how we should live! Who knows if we'll get another chance to enjoy ourselves next time? So we should have as much fun as possible!" Doug, who was rather carefree, said indifferently.
I was startled and fell silent. This topic seemed too heavy. Let's cut it off...
"It's you, though..."
Doug glanced at me sideways and said disdainfully, "I really don't know what you guys are thinking. Why do you insist on wearing a Cloak and being so secretive? It's not like you've done anything bad, so why cover yourself up so completely? Like me,"
He puffed out his half-exposed chest muscles, which were like rocks.
"I originally thought you, Wu, were special, but I didn't expect you to be assimilated by those gloomy Mages too." Doug shook his head, looking disappointed.
I didn't retort—although I trusted Doug and the others, I still decided to hide the fact that this Cloak was Equipment.
(end of chapter)